January 5, 2015
Living: 1. having life, being alive. 2. in actual existence or use; extant. 3. active or thriving; vigorous; strong. 4. lifelike, true to life. 5. being in its natural state or place, burning or glowing, alive. 6. very; absolute. 7. the act or condition of a person or thing that lives.
Extant: 1. still existing, not destroyed or lost.
Meantime: 1. the intervening time.
I picked up one of my books today by Iyanla Vanzant that I haven't read in years called "Living Through the Meantime." The subtitle of the book is "Learning to break the patterns of the past and begin the healing process."
As I was thumbing through the pages I realized that I actually have the workbook of the book "In the Meantime." The meantime is a working time. Iyanla describes the meantime as the "9-5 time of your life to bring everything together that you have learned, studied, been told, understand, and recognize about yourself and life." Iyanla goes on to say that "the meantime is a time of strengthening the knowledge in order for it to work in your life." "It's a time where you land when you saw it coming, did not know what to do about it, ran around frantically for a while, and finally said, "Okay! Okay! I don't like it, but I am willing to deal with it!" Iyanla also states that "willingness is the key that transforms a character-developing experience into a soul-enhancing one" and "at the core of your soul is the essence of love."
Wow! and Whoa! I just shook my head in total belief that I came across the book at this particular time in my life because it just falls in line with exactly where I am, yet it's another confirmation that I am on the right path in my life. It's no coincidence that this book is a workbook because 2015 is the year of me doing the necessary work to live my best life.
In the meantime, the intervening time of the necessary transformation that quickeneth the awaking of my soul and spirit while thriving with existence is powerful, I am strong, and invincible. I live my life on purpose with purpose while glowing in my natural state of absolution and truth!!
"Mind is the Master power that moulds and makes, And Man is Mind, and evermore he takes The tool of Thought, and shaping what he wills, Brings forth a thousand joys, a thousand ills: ~ He thinks in secret, and it comes to pass: Environment is but his looking-glass."
~James Allen
Monday, January 5, 2015
"Battlefield of the Mind!"
January 4, 2015
Battlefield: 1. the field of ground in which a battle is fought. 2. an area of contention, conflict, of hostile opposition.
Battle: 1. any fight, conflict or struggle. 2. struggle, strive, to force or accomplish by fighting, struggling.
Like the Nike slogan, "Just Do It!" I'm finding that the only thing that's keeping me from taking the next necessary steps toward a life of health and wellness is the thoughts that are in my head. Physically, I am fully capable of getting up out the house and going for a walk, or going to the gym and working out with weight training, or even taking two steps to the end of my bed and sit on my exercise bike and workout while watching television, yet I haven't taken the steps yet...... Why? I ask myself. And, the only thing that's stopping me is the battle that's going on in my head, my mind. I could speak to all the reasons, but then I would be speaking to all the excuses. Wayne Dwyer says it best, Excuses BEGONE........
That's where I am. I won't allow another excuse to keep me away from the big picture. I am on a mission. I am a woman determined to do whatever I need to do to have the body of health and wellness by any means necessary, my very life is depending on me to do what I need to do. I visualize it, I see it, now I have to "Just Do It!"
"Don't compromise yourself, you are all you've got."
~Janice Joplin
Battlefield: 1. the field of ground in which a battle is fought. 2. an area of contention, conflict, of hostile opposition.
Battle: 1. any fight, conflict or struggle. 2. struggle, strive, to force or accomplish by fighting, struggling.
Like the Nike slogan, "Just Do It!" I'm finding that the only thing that's keeping me from taking the next necessary steps toward a life of health and wellness is the thoughts that are in my head. Physically, I am fully capable of getting up out the house and going for a walk, or going to the gym and working out with weight training, or even taking two steps to the end of my bed and sit on my exercise bike and workout while watching television, yet I haven't taken the steps yet...... Why? I ask myself. And, the only thing that's stopping me is the battle that's going on in my head, my mind. I could speak to all the reasons, but then I would be speaking to all the excuses. Wayne Dwyer says it best, Excuses BEGONE........
That's where I am. I won't allow another excuse to keep me away from the big picture. I am on a mission. I am a woman determined to do whatever I need to do to have the body of health and wellness by any means necessary, my very life is depending on me to do what I need to do. I visualize it, I see it, now I have to "Just Do It!"
"Don't compromise yourself, you are all you've got."
~Janice Joplin
Sunday, January 4, 2015
"Daring Greatly!"
January 3, 2015
Dare: 1. to have the necessary courage or boldness for something; be bold enough: 2. to have the boldness to try; venture; hazard. 3. to meet defiantly; face courageously. 4. to challenge or provoke (a person) into a demonstration of courage: 5. an act of daring or defiance.
Greatly: 1. greatness.
Great: 1. unusually or comparatively large in size or dimensions: big. 2. unusual or considerable in degree, power, intensity, etc. 3. first-rate; excellent, having unusual merit. 4. of notable or lofty character. 5. enthusiastic about some specified activity.
"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood; who strives valiantly.... who at the best knows in the end the triumph of high achievement, and who at the worst, if he fails, at least fails while daring greatly!"
~Theodore Roosevelt
I picked up the book "Daring Greatly" by Dr. Brene' Brown a few months ago and I tell ya, I couldn't put it down until I finished it. In the book she talks a lot about shame, vulnerability and how to recognize it. She also talks about daring greatly by getting off the sidelines, getting off the bench and getting into the ring of life by trying, and if by chance while trying you fall, or maybe even fail at least you got off your rump and dared to do. When I heard the quote by Theodore Roosevelt, I knew that I was going to be the one that would dare greatly again. Reading the quote was confirmation and solace for me. I felt like someone understood me and had my back even if I failed at all that I attempted to do, I found serenity in knowing that it takes courage to put myself out in front of others to open my mouth and share my ideas, and thoughts.
"2015 is the Year of Daring Greatly!!"
This year I will Dare to dream and then do what's necessary to bring my dreams into fruition. I Dare to say YES to myself and life. I Dare to live life to it's fullest even knowing that I have to step out alone on my own, I choose to live life! I Dare to love myself, Lolita Arnez Jackson enough to give me all that I deserve and more. I won't wait for someone else to validate my worth, I know that I am worthy of my best love, the same love that I pour into any and everyone else that comes across my path. If they even look like they need it, there I am giving it, pouring out of my cup until there's nothing left and then I'll go get and go do more, yet as my cup empties and my well runs dry I have nothing left to fill my depleted vessel.
This YEAR in 2015, I am my own "Passion Project". I am Passionately loving myself more than anyone and anything else in this world. This year I AM putting the oxygen mask on myself (Lolita) first by letting 2015 be the year of me working a selfish program. What a great way to put my plan and program to work and action and wouldn't I know it that as soon as I opened up my mouth and spirit to acceptance of my new found awareness, the first 6 days of the New Year has me home alone with no one around, just myself in stillness and solitude (that all by itself is daunting for me) daring to continue to open myself up to vulnerability and uncertainty. It's here, right here that I've found myself so many times before, right on the verge of success, I see it, it looks good, yet it's also here that I,in the past will turn around and run from that which terrifies me "SUCCESS". I would never dare to face emotional exposure are you kidding me? I'd rather walk on broken glass with my bare feet. I'm not doing that to myself anymore. I dare to take the necessary risk of exposure, uncertainty and vulnerability by doing the work, sweating it out, running the race to victory!
"The secret to success is not to try to avoid or get rid of or shrink from your problems; the secret is to grow yourself so that you are bigger than any problem."
~T. Harv Eker
Dare: 1. to have the necessary courage or boldness for something; be bold enough: 2. to have the boldness to try; venture; hazard. 3. to meet defiantly; face courageously. 4. to challenge or provoke (a person) into a demonstration of courage: 5. an act of daring or defiance.
Greatly: 1. greatness.
Great: 1. unusually or comparatively large in size or dimensions: big. 2. unusual or considerable in degree, power, intensity, etc. 3. first-rate; excellent, having unusual merit. 4. of notable or lofty character. 5. enthusiastic about some specified activity.
"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood; who strives valiantly.... who at the best knows in the end the triumph of high achievement, and who at the worst, if he fails, at least fails while daring greatly!"
~Theodore Roosevelt
I picked up the book "Daring Greatly" by Dr. Brene' Brown a few months ago and I tell ya, I couldn't put it down until I finished it. In the book she talks a lot about shame, vulnerability and how to recognize it. She also talks about daring greatly by getting off the sidelines, getting off the bench and getting into the ring of life by trying, and if by chance while trying you fall, or maybe even fail at least you got off your rump and dared to do. When I heard the quote by Theodore Roosevelt, I knew that I was going to be the one that would dare greatly again. Reading the quote was confirmation and solace for me. I felt like someone understood me and had my back even if I failed at all that I attempted to do, I found serenity in knowing that it takes courage to put myself out in front of others to open my mouth and share my ideas, and thoughts.
"2015 is the Year of Daring Greatly!!"
This year I will Dare to dream and then do what's necessary to bring my dreams into fruition. I Dare to say YES to myself and life. I Dare to live life to it's fullest even knowing that I have to step out alone on my own, I choose to live life! I Dare to love myself, Lolita Arnez Jackson enough to give me all that I deserve and more. I won't wait for someone else to validate my worth, I know that I am worthy of my best love, the same love that I pour into any and everyone else that comes across my path. If they even look like they need it, there I am giving it, pouring out of my cup until there's nothing left and then I'll go get and go do more, yet as my cup empties and my well runs dry I have nothing left to fill my depleted vessel.
This YEAR in 2015, I am my own "Passion Project". I am Passionately loving myself more than anyone and anything else in this world. This year I AM putting the oxygen mask on myself (Lolita) first by letting 2015 be the year of me working a selfish program. What a great way to put my plan and program to work and action and wouldn't I know it that as soon as I opened up my mouth and spirit to acceptance of my new found awareness, the first 6 days of the New Year has me home alone with no one around, just myself in stillness and solitude (that all by itself is daunting for me) daring to continue to open myself up to vulnerability and uncertainty. It's here, right here that I've found myself so many times before, right on the verge of success, I see it, it looks good, yet it's also here that I,in the past will turn around and run from that which terrifies me "SUCCESS". I would never dare to face emotional exposure are you kidding me? I'd rather walk on broken glass with my bare feet. I'm not doing that to myself anymore. I dare to take the necessary risk of exposure, uncertainty and vulnerability by doing the work, sweating it out, running the race to victory!
"The secret to success is not to try to avoid or get rid of or shrink from your problems; the secret is to grow yourself so that you are bigger than any problem."
~T. Harv Eker
Friday, January 2, 2015
"Alchemy"
January 2, 2015
Alchemy: 1. a form of chemistry and speculative philosophy of the Middle Ages that attempted to discover an elixir of life and a method for transmuting base metals into gold. 2. any seemingly magical process of transmuting ordinary materials into something of true merit.
Alchemist: 1. a person who is versed in or practices alchemy.
It's the second day of the new year, and as excited as I am about this new year, I'm also approaching it slowly and methodically. I read the book "The Alchemist" over the summer and it was for me the way I had heard everyone that's come across it say it would be. I was immersed in it from beginning to the end. I couldn't put it down, if I had to do something that would take me away from it I'd become agitated because I just wanted to know what was going to happen next. If you haven't read it, it's one of those must reads. Since reading the book everything in my life now is a SIGN, just like in the book everything is happening for a reason, all leading back to the one thing that Santiago set out on his quest in life for and that is to find his "Personal Legend".
As for myself, on this mystical road in my life, desiring to find my "Personal Legend", I'm finding that everyday brings about very interesting circumstances that calls for me take a look inside of myself and see what's in me that needs refining. In order for to be pure gold I'm being tried by fire daily and it's not a lot of fun. Being put in the kennel of life hurt, it's painful and ugly sometimes. Just when I think I got this, something will happen to set off everything, squeeze me and ugly still comes protruding out of my pores and spirit and when that happens I know that I have to go back in the the fiery furnace again. It's then that I know that God isn't finish with me yet. I know that until I'm stressed to maximum, hungry like a starving lion, pushed to utter exhaustion, and then I get squeezed and the only thing that comes out of me is LOVE, UNDERSTANDING, and FORGIVENESS, Healthy Body, Renewed Spirit, and Pure Heart. It's then that God will have transformed my ordinary into something magical and of true merit, and until then, I'm going to continue on this path in my life as an "Alchemist", A person practicing alchemy.......
"If you're prepared, and you know what it takes, it's not a risk. You just have to figure out how to get there. There is always a way to get there.
~Mark Cuban
Alchemy: 1. a form of chemistry and speculative philosophy of the Middle Ages that attempted to discover an elixir of life and a method for transmuting base metals into gold. 2. any seemingly magical process of transmuting ordinary materials into something of true merit.
Alchemist: 1. a person who is versed in or practices alchemy.
It's the second day of the new year, and as excited as I am about this new year, I'm also approaching it slowly and methodically. I read the book "The Alchemist" over the summer and it was for me the way I had heard everyone that's come across it say it would be. I was immersed in it from beginning to the end. I couldn't put it down, if I had to do something that would take me away from it I'd become agitated because I just wanted to know what was going to happen next. If you haven't read it, it's one of those must reads. Since reading the book everything in my life now is a SIGN, just like in the book everything is happening for a reason, all leading back to the one thing that Santiago set out on his quest in life for and that is to find his "Personal Legend".
As for myself, on this mystical road in my life, desiring to find my "Personal Legend", I'm finding that everyday brings about very interesting circumstances that calls for me take a look inside of myself and see what's in me that needs refining. In order for to be pure gold I'm being tried by fire daily and it's not a lot of fun. Being put in the kennel of life hurt, it's painful and ugly sometimes. Just when I think I got this, something will happen to set off everything, squeeze me and ugly still comes protruding out of my pores and spirit and when that happens I know that I have to go back in the the fiery furnace again. It's then that I know that God isn't finish with me yet. I know that until I'm stressed to maximum, hungry like a starving lion, pushed to utter exhaustion, and then I get squeezed and the only thing that comes out of me is LOVE, UNDERSTANDING, and FORGIVENESS, Healthy Body, Renewed Spirit, and Pure Heart. It's then that God will have transformed my ordinary into something magical and of true merit, and until then, I'm going to continue on this path in my life as an "Alchemist", A person practicing alchemy.......
"If you're prepared, and you know what it takes, it's not a risk. You just have to figure out how to get there. There is always a way to get there.
~Mark Cuban
Thursday, January 1, 2015
"New Year's Evolution!!"
January 1, 2015
Evolution: 1. any process of formation or growth; development: 2. a product of development, something evolved. 3. a. change in the gene pool of a population from generation to generation by such processes as mutation and natural selection. b. the development of a species or other group of organisms; phylogeny. c. the theory that all existing organisms developed from earlier forms by natural selection. 4. a process of gradual, peaceful, progressive change and development, as in a social or economic structure.
Evolve: 1. to develop gradually; to come forth gradually into being; develop; to undergo or develop by a process of evolution.
Happy New Year! I wanted to start 2015 a little differently than I have over the last few years by not having a New Year's Resolution, but instead I'm starting a new thing by beginning the new year with a New Year's Evolution. I know that in order for me to grow and develop it's going to take some time and it's a gradual process of evolving into the person I want to become with my health, wealth and spirit. Usually I would wait until January 1, to start my resolution. I did things a little differently in 2014 leading into 2015. I started on November 3, eating right laying off of unhealthy foods and I must say I'm happy with my results. I didn't gain a pound over the holidays in fact I lost two pounds with my new found method of evolving. I'm excited about the new year and look forward to a prosperous, continual growth spurt!!
Unlock Tomorrow, Today!!
~by Lolita Jackson
Evolution: 1. any process of formation or growth; development: 2. a product of development, something evolved. 3. a. change in the gene pool of a population from generation to generation by such processes as mutation and natural selection. b. the development of a species or other group of organisms; phylogeny. c. the theory that all existing organisms developed from earlier forms by natural selection. 4. a process of gradual, peaceful, progressive change and development, as in a social or economic structure.
Evolve: 1. to develop gradually; to come forth gradually into being; develop; to undergo or develop by a process of evolution.
Happy New Year! I wanted to start 2015 a little differently than I have over the last few years by not having a New Year's Resolution, but instead I'm starting a new thing by beginning the new year with a New Year's Evolution. I know that in order for me to grow and develop it's going to take some time and it's a gradual process of evolving into the person I want to become with my health, wealth and spirit. Usually I would wait until January 1, to start my resolution. I did things a little differently in 2014 leading into 2015. I started on November 3, eating right laying off of unhealthy foods and I must say I'm happy with my results. I didn't gain a pound over the holidays in fact I lost two pounds with my new found method of evolving. I'm excited about the new year and look forward to a prosperous, continual growth spurt!!
Unlock Tomorrow, Today!!
~by Lolita Jackson
Tuesday, November 11, 2014
"Choosing Life!!"
November 10, 2014
(Deuteronomy 30:19) I call heaven and earth to record this day against you, that I have set before you life and death, blessing and cursing; therefore choose life, that both thou and thy seed may live.....KJV
(Deuteronomy 30:19) I call Heaven and Earth to witness against you today. I place before you Life and Death, Blessing and Curses. Choose life so that you and your children will live. And love God, your God, listening obediently to him, firmly embracing him. Oh yes, he is life itself, a long life settled on the soil that God, your God, promised to give your ancestors, Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob....(Message Bible)
I chose this scripture to share because the words of this scripture rang out loud as a bell in my spirit seven (7) days ago. I knew that God has been speaking to me about my health, particularly about what it takes to have a healthy body, and how my body functions. What nutrients do I need to live a long and prosperous life? What role does food have in my life when it comes to cancer, heart disease, diabetes, lethargy and depression? I knew in my spirit that the Lord was speaking to me but what was also weighing on me just as heavily was the how? How would I be able to address this demon that has wreaked havoc on me and toyed around with me for decades? Where would I get the strength to say yes to life completely because saying no wasn't working for me. I knew that food was as much of a culprit to the demise of my health as drugs or alcohol or any other negative disease causing entity would be that could destroy the body but I still didn't have the strength to say no to unhealthy foods, fats, sugars and junk so I could turn the other cheek. As much as I was saying no, and as often as I said no (which was daily insanity) it didn't matter, it wasn't until I accepted that saying no would never work, it's just the opposite that would attract the healthy, strong, disease free body that I have been wanting for decades.
I finally got it! Saying NO was causing resistance, pain and struggles, but when I said YES to life completely and let go of the negative emotions I was holding on to it allowed positive energy to began to flow in and through me.
The lights came on and the resounding sound of that bell was loud and clear. The bell even came with a comforter, someone that would explain the science of unhealthy eating and what food does to the cells and how fats and sugars do have cancer causing properties that when eaten with certain animal proteins our cells will go crazy in our bodies and cause cancer, heart disease, diabetes and even depression. I just said wow, food can cause depression? I knew at that moment that my treatment for cancer would take more than chemo, and radiation. My next treatment would be with nutrients. I know that for me, Lolita, the foods I eat must be alive and full of nutrients that feed my cells with antioxidants and phyto-nutrients. I know that God gave me another chance to get this thing right. It took having cancer three (3) times for me to finally get it.
I have always read the books, and drank the healthy Kool-Aid in theory, it's now that I'm ready as a student that I can drink the Kool-Aid and enjoy the taste of a healthy lifestyle by walking the walk and for that I am eternally thankful that the teacher appeared!!
~There is a vitality, a life force, an energy, a quickening, that is translated through you into action, and because there is only one you in all time, this expression is unique. And if you block it, it will never exist through any other medium and will be lost.
~Martha Graham
(Deuteronomy 30:19) I call heaven and earth to record this day against you, that I have set before you life and death, blessing and cursing; therefore choose life, that both thou and thy seed may live.....KJV
(Deuteronomy 30:19) I call Heaven and Earth to witness against you today. I place before you Life and Death, Blessing and Curses. Choose life so that you and your children will live. And love God, your God, listening obediently to him, firmly embracing him. Oh yes, he is life itself, a long life settled on the soil that God, your God, promised to give your ancestors, Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob....(Message Bible)
I chose this scripture to share because the words of this scripture rang out loud as a bell in my spirit seven (7) days ago. I knew that God has been speaking to me about my health, particularly about what it takes to have a healthy body, and how my body functions. What nutrients do I need to live a long and prosperous life? What role does food have in my life when it comes to cancer, heart disease, diabetes, lethargy and depression? I knew in my spirit that the Lord was speaking to me but what was also weighing on me just as heavily was the how? How would I be able to address this demon that has wreaked havoc on me and toyed around with me for decades? Where would I get the strength to say yes to life completely because saying no wasn't working for me. I knew that food was as much of a culprit to the demise of my health as drugs or alcohol or any other negative disease causing entity would be that could destroy the body but I still didn't have the strength to say no to unhealthy foods, fats, sugars and junk so I could turn the other cheek. As much as I was saying no, and as often as I said no (which was daily insanity) it didn't matter, it wasn't until I accepted that saying no would never work, it's just the opposite that would attract the healthy, strong, disease free body that I have been wanting for decades.
I finally got it! Saying NO was causing resistance, pain and struggles, but when I said YES to life completely and let go of the negative emotions I was holding on to it allowed positive energy to began to flow in and through me.
The lights came on and the resounding sound of that bell was loud and clear. The bell even came with a comforter, someone that would explain the science of unhealthy eating and what food does to the cells and how fats and sugars do have cancer causing properties that when eaten with certain animal proteins our cells will go crazy in our bodies and cause cancer, heart disease, diabetes and even depression. I just said wow, food can cause depression? I knew at that moment that my treatment for cancer would take more than chemo, and radiation. My next treatment would be with nutrients. I know that for me, Lolita, the foods I eat must be alive and full of nutrients that feed my cells with antioxidants and phyto-nutrients. I know that God gave me another chance to get this thing right. It took having cancer three (3) times for me to finally get it.
I have always read the books, and drank the healthy Kool-Aid in theory, it's now that I'm ready as a student that I can drink the Kool-Aid and enjoy the taste of a healthy lifestyle by walking the walk and for that I am eternally thankful that the teacher appeared!!
~There is a vitality, a life force, an energy, a quickening, that is translated through you into action, and because there is only one you in all time, this expression is unique. And if you block it, it will never exist through any other medium and will be lost.
~Martha Graham
Monday, June 9, 2014
"Walking Through The Valley of the Shadow of Death"
June 9, 2014
I know, the title sounds a bit morbid, kind of cryptic. That's how my body is feeling right now. Today is the beginning of my fifth week of radiation and I am going toe to toe in the ring with my treatments. Last Monday I went into my radiologists office and told him I quit! I was through with how my body is feeling. The fatigue and utter exhaustion, not to mention all the other undesirables (skin burning, turning colors, chest pains, headaches, dizziness, mouth swelling, irritation, and red lesions on the inside of my mouth along with periodic inability to swallow).
That being said, and this being my third time getting back in the ring with the whole cancer, radiation and chemo, I've made the decision to keep putting one foot in front of the other and with God's help get through this.
I just came in the house from taking a walk down to the end of the driveway, crawled up the stairs and decided to sit in front of my lap top to try and log what I'm feeling. Part of me feels like I'm literally fighting to stay alive with every breath, every minute, I'm constantly thinking about how precious life is and how bad I want to be here to give my life another chance to make good on some of the bad.
The scripture says:
"The Lord is my Shepherd, I shall not want.
He maketh me to lie down in green pastures,
he leadeth me beside the still waters.
He restoreth my soul: he leadeth me in the paths of
righteousness for his name's sake.
Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow
of death, I will fear no evil: for thou art with me; thy rod
and thy staff they comfort me.
Thou preparest a table before me in the presence of
mine enemies: thou anointest my head with oil; my cup
runneth over.
Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me all the
days of my life: and I will dwell in the house of the Lord
for ever."
"There is in this world no such force as the force of a man or woman
determined to rise. The human soul cannot be permanently chained."
~W. E. B. Dubois, Educator and Scholar
"If there is no struggle, there is no progress!"
~Frederick Douglas, Abolitionist
I know, the title sounds a bit morbid, kind of cryptic. That's how my body is feeling right now. Today is the beginning of my fifth week of radiation and I am going toe to toe in the ring with my treatments. Last Monday I went into my radiologists office and told him I quit! I was through with how my body is feeling. The fatigue and utter exhaustion, not to mention all the other undesirables (skin burning, turning colors, chest pains, headaches, dizziness, mouth swelling, irritation, and red lesions on the inside of my mouth along with periodic inability to swallow).
That being said, and this being my third time getting back in the ring with the whole cancer, radiation and chemo, I've made the decision to keep putting one foot in front of the other and with God's help get through this.
I just came in the house from taking a walk down to the end of the driveway, crawled up the stairs and decided to sit in front of my lap top to try and log what I'm feeling. Part of me feels like I'm literally fighting to stay alive with every breath, every minute, I'm constantly thinking about how precious life is and how bad I want to be here to give my life another chance to make good on some of the bad.
The scripture says:
"The Lord is my Shepherd, I shall not want.
He maketh me to lie down in green pastures,
he leadeth me beside the still waters.
He restoreth my soul: he leadeth me in the paths of
righteousness for his name's sake.
Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow
of death, I will fear no evil: for thou art with me; thy rod
and thy staff they comfort me.
Thou preparest a table before me in the presence of
mine enemies: thou anointest my head with oil; my cup
runneth over.
Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me all the
days of my life: and I will dwell in the house of the Lord
for ever."
"There is in this world no such force as the force of a man or woman
determined to rise. The human soul cannot be permanently chained."
~W. E. B. Dubois, Educator and Scholar
"If there is no struggle, there is no progress!"
~Frederick Douglas, Abolitionist
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