"I Don't Know......"

January 1, 2013.......   "I Don't Know!!"

That's the way I feel right now.  You may be saying, well, what don't you know? or Why don't you know? or How is that you don't know?  The answer is "I just don't know!!"   All I do know is..... I started 2012 with big dreams and plans of how I was gonna go about the year and what it was gonna be like and how I was gonna be a "Walking Woman That Wins!  I was gonna blog every single day and by doing so it was gonna keep me accountable.  Posting my weight and measurements for the world to see was somehow gonna make me adhere to a regimen that required consistency, dedication and by osmosis I guess I was gonna find the motivation that has been missing in my life for years.  I wouldn't dare let the words of my mouth, the speaking of my tongue, and the typing of my fingers keep me from fulfilling the desires of my heart and the out right necessity of my health for my life. 

I would be strong, invincible, I am Woman Hear Me Roar!! 

Right??? 

Wrong....     

Again, I climbed the mountain, stood at the edge of the cliff and jumped!!!  Yep, I jumped right in!!  Now that's the part that I'm really not sure of what happened?   Did I jump in head first?  Feet first?  Did I stretch my arms out wide like an eagle and just fly right off the cliff beautifully, you know, picture perfect, gliding side to side without a care in the world, not caring about what was at the bottom because I was an eagle, I'd swoop down, pick up what I needed fur sustenance and would fly back up arms stretched wide and if it was a storm I'd get even stronger and fly up above it.  If I missed a day, so what, I would just come back the next day and get it in. 

Right??? 

Wrong.....

It turns out it didn't happen that way, somehow, somewhere after I jumped, I let the turbulence of life get in my way.  Somewhere I took off my mask, I lost oxygen and the cabin pressures of life got the best of me and I got off course, lost my way with my healthy life plan.  My "Healthy is the new Sexxxy mantra!!"   I stopped being a "Walking Woman That Wins." not only did I stop walking, I came to a freaking crawl!! 

"Errrrrrk!!!"   "Screeeech!!"  "Crash!!"  "Boom Boom!!"

So, that brings me to January 1, 2013....I ask myself How Lo?  When Lo?  How Lo?  How?  The answer is  

"I don't know how?"     "I just don't know????"

This is what I do know........  I was at the edge again, looking over and I had a decision to make, do I jump again?  Or????  What????  What do I do??

Yep!!!  You Guessed It!!!

I jumped!!!!  LMAO.....Yep, I have jumped again!!   

It's 2013, I Thank God I have lived to see it, I got out of my house and at midnight bringing in the New Year I was out walking in the brisk, cold night air loving every minute of it!!!   I don't have all the answers, I couldn't tell you how? What? When? or Where?  But I do KNOW WHY???

Healthy is the new SEXXXY!!  I am determined to live a Healthy, Sexxxy Life!!!  That's all I think about, dream about and know I must be about.  Again, I will speak it, write it, type it, walk it, until I be what I feel deep inside the core of my very existence, my soul, my spirit, the essence of who I am must be healthy and strong!!   The Lioness in me will have it no other way!! 

And Yes........


I Am Lolita, A Walking Woman That's Winning....Hear me Roar!!!


"Amid the turmoil and tumult of battle, there may be seeming disorder and yet no real disorder at all; amid confusion and chaos, your array may be without head or tail, yet it will be proof against defeat."
~ Sun Tzu ~

"Simulated disorder postulates perfect discipline; simulated fear postulates courage; simulated weakness postulates strength."  ~ Sun Tzu ~

"La La Lolita"